God's Protection

At night the walls closed in around me. It was quiet for the most part and very lonely. While I was "wired on steriods" one night before my surgery, I decided to walk around to a small hospitatlity area available for the patients. There were all kinds of drinks, crackers and peanut butter. As long as I took my Mestinon every 4 hours I could chew and swallow.  Just as I got to the ice machine my legs buckled without any warning. I fell backward onto the concrete hospital floor. My head crashed against the floor. I remember seeing stars just like a cartoon character when he is hit on the head. The nurse heard the noise and came around the corner just as I was trying to get off the floor. She made me stay on the floor and called Dr. K. I put my hand up to the back of my head and the knot that was already formed was as big as the entire palm of my hand including my fingers. It was huge.

Dr. K gave orders for me to have a CAT scan to be sure that I had not injured my head. I sat in the wheelchair as the nurse took me to the radiology department. I remember asking God if He had brought me this far in this MG journey and I was going to die from a head injury. I prayed the entire trip downstairs. The nurse talked constantly. I remember her saying that I was going to be okay and that everything was going to be fine. It is not clear if she was trying to convince me or herself. She wheeled me into the room with the CAT scan and left. The radiologist helped me out of the wheelchair to the table on the machine. I was still praying. As I began to lie down on the CAT scan table, I had an overwhelming feeling of God's prescene. I literallly felt like I was lying down in the palm of God's hand. It was one of the most comforting feelings of security I have ever experienced. I told the radiologist that I knew my head was fine. The radiologist called by the time I arrived back in my room to report the CAT scan was negative. There was nothing wrong.

This was one of the times I experienced God's protection in the midst of all the uncertaintiy. God is my constant protector and companion throughtout this journey. “You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance.” Psalm 32:7